There’s something I deeply respect about non-humans who are reserved. The ones who would never just give away their affection to whoever passes by.
Don’t get me wrong, I love pups I’ve never met who run up to me like I’m a long-lost friend or chimpanzees who immediately want to play with strangers.
But for animals I expect to have a long-term relationship, I’m drawn to the aloof. The stand-offish. Even the disgruntled. Those who demand you earn their affection, because they deserve no less.
This is what first won me over with Negra.
She is not happy-go-lucky. She’s not one to seek out the attention of caregivers for a game or just to hang out. She’s the Queen, after all.
I’ve started to go through videos of Negra taken over the last 13 years to put together a video compilation for the Queen’s Brunch next month. It’s really great to revisit and be able to relive those moments with Negra where she allowed me or another caregiver to be a friend. It’s going to be difficult to whittle down the clips, but I hope you appreciate the video when we show it on June 13th.
Jamie, unlike Negra, constantly seeks out the humans, but interactions are almost always 100% on her terms. She knows what she wants from us (usually some variation of walking around Young’s Hill), and she expects us to comply.
Today, she indicated that she wanted me to walk around the hill shortly after we had put out a lunch forage. I dutifully started the routine on the human-side of the fence. Instead of continuing the walk, however, Jamie planted herself in a fire hose hammock partway up the hill. I know from previous experience that she expected me to wait for her. Or maybe today she just wanted to be the subject of a photo shoot.
Missy, as we’ve said many times on the blog before, is a “chimps’ chimp”. She seems to view the humans as peripheral to her social circle. We serve a purpose in bringing her tomatoes, but most of the time she’s not looking for anything more than that from us. This is why it is always special when she spots a caregiver from a distance, gives a look, and takes off for a game of chase. Or when she comes up to the caging where a caregiver is sitting, turns around, and presses her back up, allowing, for a short while, the caregiver to groom her.
I don’t have photos of that from today, but I do have these photos of Missy gathering the bulk of the lilacs that Anna carefully placed in the treat rock.
Our dog Honey B was very much aloof. If you know dog breeds and I say she was a Chow Chow, you likely have some idea of her personality. If you are suddenly confused why we had a dog named Honey B before there was a chimpanzee at the sanctuary named Honey B, I direct you to this blog post that tells the unlikely story of the direct connection of these two.
Honey B the dog had no time for anyone’s nonsense, so the fact that she chose to bestow her attention on me was a huge gift. Still, I had to work for her affection and respect her boundaries every step of the way.
There’s another nonhuman at the sanctuary right now who has similar qualities: Honey Cow.
Little by little, she is warming up to her caregivers. Yesterday, she was lying down in the sun, and I sat in front of her. I was sure she was going to get up when I reached out and touched her head. She half-heartedly swung away, but she stayed. One of these days, maybe one of us will completely win her over. On her terms.
perseverance………….
That’s been my experience too Diana, It just means so much more when you finally win them over.
I started fostering a dog who didn’t trust anyone. But when she decided I was her person, It was pretty special. Of course she needed up staying 🙂
Ended up !
(Dang auto correct)
Wow, what an experience today’s blog is! I followed the link to the story about Neggie and my heart went out to her. When I was new here, I had chosen her as my preferred lady, because I felt an affinity towards her. Every time I read a story about babies being taken so young, and *sold* as commodities, mindless of the pain to the poor mother, I feel a furious impotence and heartache for our chimpanzee ladies. What lives they’ve lived. And what lives you’re giving them here at CSNW! I thank you and applaud you for your knowing caretaking. I was once articulate concerning such heartfelt expriences. Now I suppose it’s enough to find joy and all the expressions involved in the wonderful people you all are, and in the knowledge you bring, and in the heart to use what you know to give these chimp people the kind of life they deserve. And to share it so willingly.
I second what you have written. Even as we celebrated Jody’s birthday the other day on Mother’s Day, I am always reminded of the cruel theft not only of her children, but of those to whom Negra, Missy, Annie and Foxie were also meant to nurture.
Over the past four years that I have followed this blog and have endeavored in my meagre way to contribute to the support of the residents of the CSNW, I have always wished and hoped that, somehow, the cruelties which were inflicted upon the residents (the original Seven of whom I first became aware) can be transcended in the passage of time. Perhaps that is wishful thinking; the years of imprisonment that the seven endured cannot be undone, and for this I once again grieve. That Negra should possess an aloof demeanor is understandable if, also, empirical evidence of the permanent psychological damage which was inflicted upon her by humans. I trust that academic research at Central Washington University (or elsewhere) has resulted in studies of the behavioral
and psychological detriment inflicted upon great apes who have been placed by humans in in abusive environments (i.e., their exploitation in the biomedical and “entertainment” sectors).
Thus, I cherish the vision captured in a photograph from the April 21 blog posting. There, Negra yields a rare look of joy as she walks upon new, green blades of grass rising from the soil. It both a simple pleasure yet, also significant: for the past one-quarter of her life, she has been able to simply live.
I wish I could peek over your shoulder as you review the old videos of Negra. I look forward to seeing your new compilation to mark June’s celebration of Negra’s life. It never registered with me before that Negra was referred to as Queen of her clan prior to coming to CSNW. Even Buckshire could see who she was within and yet, there she sat in a dark basement. It is so heartbreaking I can’t begin to express how I feel.
You stated you don’t believe in fate but there is clearly a thread connecting you to a commonality in your compassion for animals and your guiding star, the name Honey B! Your story goes beyond coincidence. Very curios happenings indeed.
Missy’s story is equally interesting. I was happy to see the photo of Missy with best companion Annie and Honey B all together in one room. For me it’s not important if Missy and Honey B knew the magnitude of the moment, it’s the fact that your thread brought them both under your care. No one can change the past but you can improve their futures. And I have no doubt that they all know you have done exactly this.
PS: from my experience I find the challenging ones have the most to give. If you are fortunate enough to have them except and understand you, once you become part of their circle (even if it’s a circle of two!) you become the recipient of a powerfully loving friendship and your world opens up to a richness you can only gain through a non human animal relationship. I celebrate the animals who challenge me, and as I write this one sits close to my side.
I feel honored. When a dog, a cat, a person, acknowledges me with their attention, I feel honored.
Here in the Inlet village of Jupiter Florida, we have many rock ‘n’ roll bands. And lots of local places for them to jam. Being of an age where we grew up with rock ‘n’ roll, my husband and I followed the music several times a week. We knew everybody’s name. Like Cheers. We felt a part of it all. When I lost my husband, I didn’t follow the music for maybe a couple of years. Then one day I decided to go see one of my favorites, and when I walked in, mid song, the singer said… Hey Paulette! I didn’t even realize they knew my name. And I felt so honored. It took me a while to figure out the feeling, but eventually I decided the feeling was “honored”.
So when your chimpanzees bless you with attention, feel honored.
Especially from The Queen!!!